I quit.
Chris is lost to us, the Chris we knew. He managed to turn into an ass in one felled swoop, in less than what, twenty minutes? Something's wrong with him, he doesn't see it, and he's not willing to try and fix it. He thinks this is the "new him". It's destroying me to see him go like this, when just last night, he was fine, everything was ok. But no, not now. Now, he's turned into... Well, the best way I can describe it is a monster. He's turned into one of those "Elitest Christians", the ones that think they're holier than everybody else, they think that God would make them his vessels. *snorts* God wouldn't touch Chris now with a ten foot pole. I don't blame him. Chris has become vindictive and... Well, I'm surprised he even talks to anyone now, us "non Christians." He pities us, thinks that we haven't seen the light, that we're beneath him because we don't adore God like he does. Something I was worried about him becoming, something I thought was avoided.
Didn't I know this was coming? I mean, deep down, didn't I know that Chris was never good enough for Lexi? That he was weak in mind and spirit, that he'd never be able to become a man for her? Maybe. I might've known. But I gave him the benefit of the doubt, I believed in him when I shouldn't have. And I prayed. I hoped that God had chosen wisely. *shakes head* No, it was wrong. Things shouldn't have happened this way. I fought this for too long, fought, as I've said before, a battle that was already over. I fought for something I believed, and I was wrong. *sighs and looks at Lexi* I'm sorry. If I'd known, if I'd admitted it to myself, none of this would've happened. But he's lost, he's gone, he thinks he's finding himself, and he couldn't be further from the truth. But you know what I always say:
You can't argue with an idiot.
I'm hurting, yes. I'm broken hearted, yes. I feel like I've failed everybody, yes. And I feel very lost, yes. I'm so worried about Lexi, I'm sick with it.
I have no direction now, no where to go, no where to turn. I don't want to accept defeat, but I've lost. I was put here on this Earth for some reason. Couldn't be just to suffer, could it? To watch my friends suffer? To see others get lost and never find their ways home again?
I told Chris that no good Christian would do what he's done, would think like he does. I told him that the Bible was written by humans, by men. I just want to know what makes him think that his God is more valid than any other God that ever claimed to exist? What makes his God any more real, and more right, than say, Anubis or Seth or Odin or Zeus? Nothing. And that's the funny thing: it's a popularity contest. Only because in the last few thousand years the Christian God has become the most popular and well known God, doesn't mean that the rest of us are hethens and are going to burn in hell. That's why I don't like religion: If you believe in something else, you're evil and are going to die and go to hell. I mean, c'mon, then EVERYBODY'S going to hell! C'mon, now, people, grow the hell up! No pun intended. If you were to believe that everyone that didn't believe in what you believed in were going to go to hell, then you're no better than a racist. Because that's exactly what it is: Religious racism. They don't like you, don't socialize with you, because you're different than they are. *shakes head* Disturbing. Another reason I hate hard core religious people. If England had gotten the shit beat out of it a couple hundred years ago by the Vikings, I can guarantee you that we'd be worshiping Odin and Thor right now. The same people that say that God is everything to them, blah blah blah, would be singing a different tune. And why? Because of popularity. The Christian God is the most popular God right now. And the people, like Chris, that strut around and claim that their god is better than anyone else's make me sick. Because it's wrong, and it's religious racism, and damnit, nobody should have to take it anymore.
Chris is weak minded and weak spirited. He needed something to believe in, and he gave in and threw himself at something that has no more validity than anything else on this world. They have a word for that:
Brainwashed.
People that are weak in who they are are so easily sucked into this game, they think they have to have something to believe in, instead of believing in themselves. And believing that they're better than everybody else because they pray to the most popular god on the block makes them feel like they belong, like they have an identity. Because, let's face it people, people that believe they belong somewhere have to have something to look down on to make themselves feel important. Something to identify with. There isn't a person on this planet that doesn't look down on someone else for some reason or another and believe it's ok because "that's who we are." I'll freely admit I look down on stupid people. I hate stupid people, that's my allergy, and everybody knows it. But it gives me an identity, something that I can point at and go, "See, that's who I am. I'll like you if you're not stupid."
If we could get rid of that part of ourselves, we'd be amazed at how happy we can be. But most people can't. I know I can't. But I'm still working on it.
Gah, I don't know where this was going, but I'm sitting here in mom's office and bawling my eyes out, because I feel like I've lost something very important. But you know what? I still have the best person in my life, the reason I found the clan. I still have Lexi, and you know what? In the end, this will all be worth it, because she's my best friend, my constant companion, and I know I will never turn my back on her.
Never.
Do with that what you will, but I stand by, and will always stand by her. No matter what life throws at us, we're going to stand strong, because we are what counts.
Name-Cheska
Age-22
School-Life
Graduated from- Gryffindor
bday-10/19
[[ The Wishlist ]]
New wand!
Best friend's last autobiography
Torture the potions master in horrible, violent ways
New broom
Punch Percy in face
Bring Sirius back to life
Get Ron and Hermione to finally date
Make Umbridge disappear
Bring Dumbledore back to life!!!!
Buy a hippogriff
Buy a dragon
Lexi's Blog
Thalionmorgul
My Art Gallery
Inu vs. Sess (Our gaming review blog)
Da creater
I quit.
Chris is lost to us, the Chris we knew. He managed to turn into an ass in one felled swoop, in less than what, twenty minutes? Something's wrong with him, he doesn't see it, and he's not willing to try and fix it. He thinks this is the "new him". It's destroying me to see him go like this, when just last night, he was fine, everything was ok. But no, not now. Now, he's turned into... Well, the best way I can describe it is a monster. He's turned into one of those "Elitest Christians", the ones that think they're holier than everybody else, they think that God would make them his vessels. *snorts* God wouldn't touch Chris now with a ten foot pole. I don't blame him. Chris has become vindictive and... Well, I'm surprised he even talks to anyone now, us "non Christians." He pities us, thinks that we haven't seen the light, that we're beneath him because we don't adore God like he does. Something I was worried about him becoming, something I thought was avoided.
Didn't I know this was coming? I mean, deep down, didn't I know that Chris was never good enough for Lexi? That he was weak in mind and spirit, that he'd never be able to become a man for her? Maybe. I might've known. But I gave him the benefit of the doubt, I believed in him when I shouldn't have. And I prayed. I hoped that God had chosen wisely. *shakes head* No, it was wrong. Things shouldn't have happened this way. I fought this for too long, fought, as I've said before, a battle that was already over. I fought for something I believed, and I was wrong. *sighs and looks at Lexi* I'm sorry. If I'd known, if I'd admitted it to myself, none of this would've happened. But he's lost, he's gone, he thinks he's finding himself, and he couldn't be further from the truth. But you know what I always say:
You can't argue with an idiot.
I'm hurting, yes. I'm broken hearted, yes. I feel like I've failed everybody, yes. And I feel very lost, yes. I'm so worried about Lexi, I'm sick with it.
I have no direction now, no where to go, no where to turn. I don't want to accept defeat, but I've lost. I was put here on this Earth for some reason. Couldn't be just to suffer, could it? To watch my friends suffer? To see others get lost and never find their ways home again?
I told Chris that no good Christian would do what he's done, would think like he does. I told him that the Bible was written by humans, by men. I just want to know what makes him think that his God is more valid than any other God that ever claimed to exist? What makes his God any more real, and more right, than say, Anubis or Seth or Odin or Zeus? Nothing. And that's the funny thing: it's a popularity contest. Only because in the last few thousand years the Christian God has become the most popular and well known God, doesn't mean that the rest of us are hethens and are going to burn in hell. That's why I don't like religion: If you believe in something else, you're evil and are going to die and go to hell. I mean, c'mon, then EVERYBODY'S going to hell! C'mon, now, people, grow the hell up! No pun intended. If you were to believe that everyone that didn't believe in what you believed in were going to go to hell, then you're no better than a racist. Because that's exactly what it is: Religious racism. They don't like you, don't socialize with you, because you're different than they are. *shakes head* Disturbing. Another reason I hate hard core religious people. If England had gotten the shit beat out of it a couple hundred years ago by the Vikings, I can guarantee you that we'd be worshiping Odin and Thor right now. The same people that say that God is everything to them, blah blah blah, would be singing a different tune. And why? Because of popularity. The Christian God is the most popular God right now. And the people, like Chris, that strut around and claim that their god is better than anyone else's make me sick. Because it's wrong, and it's religious racism, and damnit, nobody should have to take it anymore.
Chris is weak minded and weak spirited. He needed something to believe in, and he gave in and threw himself at something that has no more validity than anything else on this world. They have a word for that:
Brainwashed.
People that are weak in who they are are so easily sucked into this game, they think they have to have something to believe in, instead of believing in themselves. And believing that they're better than everybody else because they pray to the most popular god on the block makes them feel like they belong, like they have an identity. Because, let's face it people, people that believe they belong somewhere have to have something to look down on to make themselves feel important. Something to identify with. There isn't a person on this planet that doesn't look down on someone else for some reason or another and believe it's ok because "that's who we are." I'll freely admit I look down on stupid people. I hate stupid people, that's my allergy, and everybody knows it. But it gives me an identity, something that I can point at and go, "See, that's who I am. I'll like you if you're not stupid."
If we could get rid of that part of ourselves, we'd be amazed at how happy we can be. But most people can't. I know I can't. But I'm still working on it.
Gah, I don't know where this was going, but I'm sitting here in mom's office and bawling my eyes out, because I feel like I've lost something very important. But you know what? I still have the best person in my life, the reason I found the clan. I still have Lexi, and you know what? In the end, this will all be worth it, because she's my best friend, my constant companion, and I know I will never turn my back on her.
Never.
Do with that what you will, but I stand by, and will always stand by her. No matter what life throws at us, we're going to stand strong, because we are what counts.